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kschang
04-01-2013, 11:58 AM
I just had this thought about writing a joke / metaphor about scams and MLM.

You've seen the jokes that involves a fictional scenario, and how the various solutions would solve it. The most common example would be "how many _____ would it take to change a light bulb and why?"

What if we write one about MLM, Ponzi, and such?

Here's a few that I had in mind:


How would a ______ market water to slightly thirsty people? (i.e. not desperately thirsty yet)

Ponzi: Give me your water, I promise to give you twice the amount back tomorrow!

Motivational speaker: If you don't go out there you'll never FIND water! Get out there! Taste everything!

"Attraction Marketer": If you are more RECEPTIVE to water, the sky will rain on you!

Zeek: Give me your water, I promise to give you back a sip per day in exchange for telling people about me.

And so on and so forth.

Feel free to contribute your own, modify a few, improve the question, and so on.

laidback
04-01-2013, 12:16 PM
Pyramid purveyor...We're helping the little people get water.

ribshaw
04-01-2013, 12:57 PM
The bloggers at RealScam are negative atheist dreamstealers who drink blood and want good people to be forever thirsty. Avoid them at all costs.

laidback
04-01-2013, 05:07 PM
Ken Russo/Dr Dave...This is the best water pump I've ever seen!

kschang
04-02-2013, 02:48 AM
The bloggers at RealScam are negative atheist dreamstealers who drink blood and want good people to be forever thirsty. Avoid them at all costs.

I think I'll take your lead and modify it somewhat.

Anti-MLMers: Don't listen to their water speech. They'll take your water instead.

Anti-anti-MLMers: Don't listen to them. They just don't want you to have any water.

kschang
04-02-2013, 02:50 AM
"Business Opportunity" promoter: You have to give out water in order to get water!

laidback
04-02-2013, 05:06 PM
Naysayers: You Ponzi pimps and shills don't care that your water is stolen...!

kschang
04-03-2013, 02:33 PM
"If you're really serious about getting lots and lots of water, you'd let me take a sip of your water first."

"Selling bogus water is a huge industry! Why don't you ever have anything NICE to say about us?"

kschang
04-06-2013, 12:49 AM
HYIPers: Yes, you can get lots and lots of water! This is a special water plant! If you feed this plant with water, you'll get back your water tenfold through our special and secret DNA manipulation!

littleroundman
04-06-2013, 12:54 AM
MLMers = Our water costs more because it's better quality water.

ribshaw
04-06-2013, 08:17 AM
MLMers = Our water costs more because it's better quality water.

And it is super concentrated water, so on a "per use" basis you are coming out way ahead.

ribshaw
04-06-2013, 09:01 AM
"If you're really serious about getting lots and lots of water, you'd let me take a sip of your water first."

This is clearly the pure genius of any of these "opportunities", and the closer sip moves to gulp the worse off you usually end up. As an aside there is some interesting reading on the cumulative effect of a "sip or fee" anytime you are trying to build wealth.